My goal in life is to follow the guidance of inner spirit in whatever I do. It may seem like a nebulous goal, but when the effort is ongoing, continuous, it forms a structure for life. Call it what you may, inner spirit, the still small voice within, the center of our being, this guidance is precious if we can settle into it. The challenge I have set myself this year, to "focus on focus", essentially explores how to do this, using day to day experiences as my field of exploration.
Today the sun is out, perhaps for the whole day. In the Pacific Northwest, this is a real gift. As someone whose spirits are affected by grey days (see: Darkness and Light), my energy is at its highest on days like this. I want to make the best use of my time, but the pressure I put on myself to find that (perfect) best use makes it difficult to settle down, to focus.
One of the hardest things to do, I think, is to capture the quiet, very quiet, impulse that comes from deep within us and is our truest guidance. My mind can skim the surface of one thing, then the surface of another, never lighting on anything, while a day's sunny moments slip by. The essential me, in all that skimming, cannot come to the surface and provide that one still impulse of direction that says “this, this is where to put your attention”.
Writing helps me to focus. In the process of writing this, I suddenly realized that the sunshine itself is the focus for the day. This means there are some parameters for my activities: doing things on the sunny side of the house, doing them outdoors rather than indoors when possible, and doing things that are physically active (because the sun energizes me). With the sunshine as my organizing center, I move into the days activities, bathed in sunlight, warmed by its joy, satisfied with what I do. I garden. I clean house. I do a sorting project in the sunny main room. There is no strain in any of this; I have found the guidance at the center of my being and can follow it throughout the day, at rest in its peace.